“I was proud to be selected as a red flag bearer for my pioneer unit. I was sent to the central house of pioneers to training courses where I had learnt how to carry my red flag and how to defend it, even with my own life. On a final day of our training we had laid flowers at a statue of Pavel Morozov and swore to follow his example. I cried at night when I remembered that Pavel’s own family had murdered him for showing loyalty to his country.

Completely indoctrinated, I often thought how to follow in the Pavel’s footsteps and pondered whether I should denounce my own parents to earn an approbation from our pioneer leaders. I had failed to find any concrete reason, except that, in comparison with the archetypal socialist women, my own mother appeared to be too pretty. Even in my indoctrinated state I was certain that “being too pretty” was not a sufficient reason for denunciation of my own mother.”

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